Free your mind.

I spent this past week in Ocean City, MD with two of my best friends from my first college (Randolph-Macon). I hadn’t seen Pat in 2 years and within that time I’d seen Ashley maybe all of two times. The three of us did everything together freshman year of college. We were inseperable and I am so glad that I had them through my first year because if not I probably would have gone insane.

Needless to say after two years of not seeing each other it’s amazing how our friendship was right where it left off. It was as if these two years never passed. I love those friends. You always know those types of people are gems. 

Here’s some snip-its from our trip :)

anniesayshii:

i deleted tumblr one night when I was drunk… I kinda miss it.

hahahahaha i did not even know this.

Today I woke up at 5am in Canada. I travelled to Chicago. I sprinted through an entire airport. I made my flight from Chicago to Baltimore just as they were closing the gate. On my flight to Baltimore I finished reading the last 150 pages of ‘Dear John’. I came home, unpacked, made a coffee and met a friend for an hour catch up session in between my arriving flight and their departing flight. I grabbed an ice-cream. I went to a three hour long sports banquet. I came home. I dressed up to go out. I cooked dinner. and I then opted for watching the Time Travellers Wife instead of going out. It simply amazes me that I have so much energy. Shouldn’t I be in bed right about now?

Tonight I went on getty images and searched “soul-mates”. I don’t know why I did this - as if I thought when the picture results came back to me there’d be this moment of clarity where I realized “oh so that’s what it’s supposed to look like”. But instead I was just faced with staged pictures of inter-racial couples and cheesy smiles. a couple holding hands looking out over a bridge. an old couple with glazed eyes and greying hair. a perfectly plump pregnant woman with her husbands arms embracing her from behind.

Aside from this random photo search I’ve been reading Dear John. Don’t judge me but I hate cheesy romance novels to every degree. But I’m captivated by this book despite the expected romanticism. I keep highlighting lines and finding ways to correlate the characters to myself and the people in my life.

I don’t know what I’m looking for. I just know that recently I’ve been feeling let down by this concept of love. I talked about this with Annie tonight - it’s just not what you thought it was when you were younger. Where did the feeling of it all go? Why do things become so much more structured when you grow up? 

When I was young I used to think that my parents were right  - that at such a young age you can’t really understand love - but now that I’m 21 and only getting older I’m starting to think that maybe when you’re young and in love you have it right the most. because your love isn’t based upon that persons common interests, their job, the way they want to raise a family. you just love the person because when you catch their eye there is something there. 

It’s not like compatibility is the issue. You could place me in a coffee shop with just about anyone and I’d find a way to have a 2 1/2 conversation with them that’d cause me to leave thinking “that person was pretty cool” - but those coffee house moments aren’t like your first experience stoned in a swimming pool making out with a boy you’ve had a summer crush on for weeks and weeks. they’re just on two different levels. It makes me wonder how you find that realness in other people once you reach a certain age. Why does this concept of love change so much from 17 to 21?

as long as we dont have to listen to her talk

10 hours ago by dafuckinphantom

…RUDE! To both the person who asked this and Dorl. 

I eat so much more healthily when I prepare my own meals. Todays lunch? Lettuce, tomato, cucumber, and fresh mozarella on wheat toast with a side of egg whites with red, green, and banana peppers :) Hoorah!